August 16 2013

A UPS mess

Editors are important for businesses, even for small tasks. Mailers that go out to hundreds or thousands of potential customers should feature clean copy. Check out these two mailers that a friend in Orlando sent us. Clearly, this UPS Store does not have an editor on hand to check out its marketing materials before they land in your mailbox.

Mailer 1:

Here, we have the obvious typo “the your” in large, bold font. However, we have some other issues as well. Item 4 in the numbered list does not flow with the stem “you get.” Remember, lists should always be in parallel structure.

Mailer 2:

In this mailer, “the your” is, once again, displayed prominently. In Item 1, “24-hour” should be hyphenated as a compound modifier. Again, Item 4 fails to flow with the stem and remain parallel with other items in the numbered list.